“Field Notes” are personal notes from my journal, quotes, and lessons learned most often the hard way. Two themes are running in the background of my life these days.

TRANSFORM & RYHTHM

2018 has been a challenge with:

• An extreme makeover of our new home. For almost an entire year each week on my days off I drove 4 hours each way to renovated it completely.
• Stepping out of my role as Pastor at Rolling Hills, where Lea Ann and I served since 2006, leaving Celebrate Recovery, DivorceCare, Re|Engage Marriage, and GriefShare in the hands of gifted passionate people.
• Stepping into mentoring men and encouraging pastors with InFaith.org.

The furnace of these three going on at the same time had a transforming effect on me and severely upset the rhythm of my life. Three weeks ago we were sent off in an amazing way by Rolling Hills and moved into our new home.  As things are slowing down here are my reflections on Transform and Rhythm.

TRANSFORM

In January, John Jackson, President of William Jessup Seminary, concluded a talk with, “I’m going to challenge you to pick one of these three words for your word for the year.” The first word was Transform. I don’t remember the other two. Instantly I knew it was Transform for me.

It has an alchemist feel to it; the idea of heat turning iron into gold. Something brand new is made in the word transform; a new wineskin – new me. Well, things started to heat up in my work, my relationships, and in the challenges that I was processing internally. We’re talking a rolling boil. Hardest year of my life.

Out of desperation I regularly meditated on The Serenity Prayer, Psalm 23, and Isaiah 26:3.

Sometimes all I could pray was “Jesus!”

The Apostle Paul, talked about being hard pressed from every direction (2 Corinthians 4:8-9). That’s what it was for me.

I hung in there, with a growing moment-by-moment reliance on His visceral Presence.

My capacity to be patient, kind, and compassionate increased.

Coming to the end of myself I found the beginning of a new way of connection with God as the Father who loves me as I am, the Son who shows me the way, and the Spirit who co-exists in me.

RHYTHM

The heat of this transforming year fried some of my most powerful rhythms. Focal practices such as took a back seat to survival:

• Running 20 miles a week became anywhere from 0 to 5 miles a week.
• Planning and organizing my life around my Life Plan went out the window as I scrapped a punch list together each day based on the immediate needs of that day.
• Sabbath did not exist for me for almost an entire year.

I was sustained by the grace of God, my wife Lea Ann, a handful of stout brothers who stood with me, and the generosity of Lead Pastor Jonathan Hansen and Executive Pastor Eric Bergen at Rolling Hills.

Now that things have settled down, I am restoring life-giving rhythms to my life. Each day I work on being intentional using Mark Batterson’s mantra from Circle Maker to dream big, pray hard, and think long with God during my daily quiet time.

TRANSFORM & RHYTHM

I’m finding that they work really well together for me in this season. It’s a challenge. God’s working with me privately under the waterline of my soul. Here’s these four or five points that I’m pulling out of this.

1. I am transformed as I restore the rhythm of life planning and daily review. This idea of life planning is figuring out what are the outcomes that I want my life to be like and to take actions that will move me closer to what is most important.
2. I am transformed as I take responsibility for the quality of my relationships. Romans 12:18 says, “Do your best to be on good terms with all people, so far as it depends on you.” What I’m finding that love is. Love is patient, kind, forgiving, compassionate, enduring. This is how the Father loves me and as a follower of His Son this is how I am to be toward others.
3. I am transformed as I lean into the Father in the midst of the great challenges.       It is not the absence of the challenges, this fallen world, or my selfish sinful self that I am transformed. I am transformed in the heat of the battle as I cry out “Jesus, Son of God, have mercy on me!  When I lean into God the Father into my most intimate and desperate crying out to the Father for help, and courage, and encouragement, and guidance. When I feel out of my comfort zone, I lean into the Father. When everything inside me screams to handle it on my own, I lean on the Father, and I’m transformed.
4. The final piece about transform and rhythm is the word Focus. Focus grounds me in what’s most important now. Fuzzy is a waste of time. But focus? Focus is where my will is transformed to see God in, with, and for me. Focus + action [over time] = traction.

CONCLUSION

As I do these things, as I do these practices, as I restore rhythm to my day of planning, and review, and looking at my calendar throughout the week, and making sure I’m doing what I need to do, I find that I’m transformed.

From my Field Note journal entry this morning:

“No matter what behavior, shortcomings, sin or success – work it out Bud – work it out with clear thinking and a stout heart – work it out with God. It is God who gives me the hearts desire and strength to do the right things. [Philippians 2:12 paraphrase]”

REFLECTION QUESTIONS

• Are you in a season where things are heating up, or have been heating up for more than a few weeks? If so, consider it may be God calling you closer. Respond by capturing your thoughts in a journal, create a bit of space to sit and listen, and invite some stout people in to what’s going on with you.
• What rhythms do you find life-giving? Are they really a rhythm or are they infrequent. Now’s the time to get real with yourself.
• How are you doing with exercise, planning, and Sabbath? Begin where you are. Small steps repeated will take you anywhere you want to go.

I am confident that God Himself, who began this great work in you, will bring it to pass. Philippians 1:6

RESOURCES

Life Leadership White Paper   This tool was created by Daniel Harkavy in his book Becoming a Coaching Leader.  Together Daniel and Michael Hyatt wrote Living Forward, a book I highly recommend. If you would like help or support as you write your Life Plan give me a call at 831-566-4131.

Sabbath: Finding Rest, Renewal, and Delight in Our Busy Lives  Wayne Muller

Living into Focus: Choosing What Matters Most in an Age of Distractions  Arthur Boers

The Way of the Heart: Connecting with God Through Prayer, Wisdom, and Silence Henri Nouwen